Do you hustle to get things done? Do you try to prove your worth by “doing it all” or being the “go-to” person? Would some people refer to you as a driven person?
I never really thought of it as a thing that I dealt with until a few years ago. An injury sidelined me from the exercise I most loved and greatly needed after the loss of my mom. I had a very stressful job, a busy family, as well as some significant stressors and I needed a way to decompress. My chiropractor told me I had to stop this vital coping strategy for the injury to heal. He told me that he knows I’m a Type A personality, but I needed to take it easy. If you aren’t aware, a Type A person is often considered driven and a little intense. I was somewhat taken aback because I always considered myself laid-back and easygoing, but in that moment, I knew that it was at least partially true.
During that time, I also began to attend Girard First United Methodist on a regular basis. That year broke me. I think the tissue budget for the church went to my use alone during that time. My husband and sons would sit in the pew with me and hand me the box (partially being funny, but knowing I would break down inevitably at some point).
My coping strategy of doing everything and then physically exerting myself to the point of exhaustion was not allowed. God was sidelining me to REST in HIM. That was such a hard year for me, but it truly was a turning point. God used so many things to restore me in my grief and fear, but one big thing He used was rest. He made it so I could do nothing but rest in Him.
I have since gotten better at not having to hustle to prove my worth. I still revert to this behavior at times, but it’s easier for me to recognize it happening and move away from that pattern of behavior. Is this something you need to work on?